The Halloween Party

halloween-partyMeet Maddie                                                                   Meet Jared

Maddie lies in bed as her cellphone alarm rings in her ear, willing her to wake.

She groans and reaches for it, knocking it off her end table as it falls, sliding further away.

“Ughhh,” she says as she grabs her pillow putting it over her head, trying to hide from the cruel reality of the morning world.

Her dorm room door burst open a few seconds later.

“HAPPY HALL-O-WEEN!!!!” her roommate Kim screams in a sing song way, her curly blonde hair bouncing as she jumps onto Maddie’s bed, causing a disruption in her comfort zone of white soft blankets and pillows.

“NO!” Maddie answers turning over and away as she hides under the covers.

“Oh come on! I thought you said this was one of your favorite holidays. Only 12 hours until all the parties start happening!”

“Correction- Halloween used to be one of my favorite holidays, (she says sitting up in a huff.) But have you forgotten how my boyfriend just broke up with me last week, – he was the other half of my costume, how can I be Raggedy Ann without an Andy?”

“Ok yes, Vinny sucks for breaking up with you. But there is an easy fix to your costume problem, honey. Buy a new one.”

“What am I made of money…?”

“Return the other, duh? Come on… get your ass in the shower, I’m coming back in a half hour and I expect you to look alive!” Kim says as she glides out of the room in an exaggerated way, her arms afloat in a fairy stance.

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Thankful for the dim lighting, Maddie drags her feet and walks into her dorm suite living area/kitchen where Kim sits eating a bowl of cereal.

“Hallelujah!” Kim sings out, throwing her hands up in the air, as her brown eyes sparkle with sarcasm.

Maddie groans as she shuffles over to the seat next to Kim, Kim smiles and slides a mug of already poured coffee over to her.  The hazelnut scent dancing in the air, creating happy thoughts in her mind.

Maddie grabs it and takes a sip.

“Ah.”

“I made a damn good pot today, right?”

Kim nods.

“Thank you. I need this.”

“So…I figured we’d just go to the mall, it has the Halloween store in it and then if we need any extra odds and ends we’ll just shop around.”

“Do we have to? Can’t I just stay home? I won’t be any fun tonight anyway.”

“No, you are not allowed to sulk.”

“I am not sulking, I’m just-“

“Sulking,” Kim says nodding with wide eyes.

Just then their suite door flies open with little warning, as a sandy brown haired, blue eyed boy saunters his way in, like he owns the place.

“Who’s sulking?” Jared says as he makes a straight line to  Maddie and grabs her cup of coffee to take a sip.

“Do not. even. I will cut you.”

Jared looks at her and puts the cup back down slowly as he holds his hands up in surrender.

“Damn girl, okay.” he says his eyes sparkling, as a smirk plays on his lips.

“Excuse her, she’s a bit testy,” Kim says chiming in on the quarrel.

“Still Vinny?”

“Still Vinny.”

“Can we just…drop it, ok?”

Maddie and Jared exchange looks of sympathy.

“Look I get this whole thing with Vinny has been hard on you, but he’s been out living his life all week, he’s not hauled up in bed, ignoring his friends and favorite holidays,” Maddie says.

“That’s because he’s a dick face who doesn’t care about the fact that he literally ripped my heart out of my chest only a week ago.”

“He is a dick face. Such a dick face. Anger. Phase 2. Yes. FINALLY!” Jared says as Maddie laughs and Kim high fives him.

Jared and Kim look over at Maddie in shock.

“I’m sorry was that a laugh?” Jared says walking behind Maddie.

Kim looks of smiling.

“No. You’re hearing things.”

“I think that was a laugh. You heard it right?” he says looking at Kim.

“Oh, loud and clear.”

Jared starts tickling Maddie’s waist and she starts laughing uncontrollably.

He stops and looks at her.

“There she goes.”

“What are you talking about?” Maddie says turning to look at him.

“My girl’s back.”

Maddie smiles simply.

“You love Halloween, don’t let one asshole guy ruin that. Let’s head to the mall, get killer costumes and have fun!” Kim says draping an arm over her best friend’s shoulders.

“Ok. Fine. But don’t you dare try and get me to wear anything short and slutty,” Maddie says her eyes rolling over to glare at Kim.

“I would not mind that,” Jared says off in a daze of day dreams and fantasies.

Maddie slaps him in the chest.

Jared winces.

“What!” he says with a smirk.

“Deal,” Kim laughs as she throws Maddie a jacket.

Kim and Maddie start to leave their suite and turn back to Jared.

“Hey, you coming?” Maddie says.

“Yes. As long as you don’t keep hitting me.”

“I’ll try.”

“Try harder.”

The three walk out, as Maddie laughs and turns to Jared.

“Oh poor baby did I hurt you?”

“A little.”

“I’m sorry.”

Jared smirks and points to his cheek.

Maddie rolls her eyes and kisses it swiftly.

Kim notices and smiles as she starts to walk ahead.

************************************************************************

“Come on out!” Kim shouts from outside the dressing room as she and Jared wait to see Maddie’s new costume choice.

“No!”

“Yes, Please.”

“No. I told you I didn’t want this type of costume.”

“You said nothing slutty, it’s not slutty at all!”

“I can’t pull this off,” Maddie mumbles.

“Oh come on out, and stop being such a brat!” Jared says jokingly.

Maddie groans and opens the door as she stands there in a pair of tight leather pants, a cropped black top, a leather jacket and combat boots.

Jared’s eyes go wide and his jaw drops.

Kim smiles.

“Hell yes! You look hot!” Kim says.

“No.”

“Yes.” Jared says not meaning to speak out loud.

Maddie and Kim look at him surprised by his outburst.

“I mean (he coughs) it looks good- on you- you look great.”

Kim watches in pure happiness.

Maddie turns to look at herself in the mirror.

Jared leans over to Kim.

“Thanks for the help on that one.”

“Hey buddy that was all you and way too much fun to watch.”

Maddie turns back around.

“You guys I cannot wear this,” she says trying to pull her crop down and her pants up, to cover her stomach.

Jared’s eyes are glued.

“Maddie. You look amazing. The biker chick look works for you. Some red lips and black nails and you are gold,” Kim says.

“I don’t know,” she says looking at herself again, cloaked in insecurities.

“Go for it.” Kim says whispering and hip bumping her friend.

“Ugh. Fine. What the hell, they say looking good is the best revenge right?”

“True.”

“Are you sure it looks good though…Jared? Be honest.”

Jared snaps out of it when he hears his name.

“Yes. Yea. I honestly I have no words for how good you look.”

“Really?” Maddie smiles looking down.

“Really.”

“See it’s perfect, go change out of it, we’ll be on line.” Kim says walking off with Jared.

Jared looks back at Maddie as his eyes look her over.

Maddie looks at herself in the mirror once more before walking into the dressing room.

Kim looks at Jared and laughs.

“What?”

“How transparent can you be?” she says.

“Really? Am I that obvious? Do you think she knows?”

“No. Lucky for you, she’s just as oblivious to receiving flirtation signals as you are to providing them. Hell you’d be a match made in heaven.”

“Ya think?” Jared says his smile dopey.

“I actually do think you’d be good together. You’re a good guy, and you care about her. She deserves that.”

“I don’t think she sees me that way though.”

“Won’t know until you try. And what a better place to do so than at a party!” Kim says her says widening and her mouth dropping like she just won the lottery of obvious ideas.

“Tonight? What? No. It’s too soon. She’s still got Vinny brain and I don’t want to be a rebound.”

“Vinny wasn’t that serious of a thing, let’s be real it’s not like she was in love with the guy.”

“I don’t know. I can’t.”

“Okay. Fine. I hope you have fun watching guy after guy after guy after guy hit on her, because looking like she does in that outfit, there’s no way you’ll be able to avoid that.”

Jared looks away pondering.

***********************************************************************

Kim walks into Maddie’s room dressed in her costume, just as she is putting her red lipstick on. 

Maddie sees her in the mirror and turns, “I love it!” she says looking at Kim who twirls around showing off her leather kitten costume.

“Thank you very much! Are you almost ready?”

“Yea, pretty much. I just thought we were waiting on Jared.”

“Ugh, nope. He had to do a beer run. He said he’d meet us there.”

“Oh ok. Cool.” Maddie looks in the mirror once more, fluffs her curly hair and smacks her lips together and out she goes following Kim into the hall.

**********************************************************************

Kim knocks on the off campus apartment door and a fellow college friend opens the door greeting them with a smirk.

“Ladies! Hey, you look great, come on in, grab a drink!”

Kim and Maddie smile and walk in as another guy hands them each a drink.

**********************************************************************

Maddie looks over at the clock. 9:50 PM. It hasn’t even been an hour. She stands leaning against a wall with a drink in her hand. She looks around as a sea of costumes and red cups fill the scene. Off to the side she watches as Kim chats up with some hot guy dressed as a Werewolf. Kim laughs as she flips her hair.

Jared walks into the party he fist bump the host and hands him a few cases of beer.

“Thanks brother, you’re lifesaver.”

He looks around his eyes surveying the scene, looking for one specific brunette, on specific set of green eyes… there she is, he thinks, his path promised as he walks toward Maddie.

“Well hey there little lady, I reckon, those two would have quite some hairy children.”

Maddie looks over and laughs.

“A cowboy. It suits you. I like it.”

“Thank you ma’am.” he says tipping his hat.

“Are you going to talk like that all night?”

“Maybe,” he says keeping the southern twang intact.

Maddie laughs.

“Maddie you look-freaking amazing.”

“Really?”

“Yes. Like Y-e-s with a capital Y and an exclamation point at the end for emphasis.”

Maddie blushes and laughs, pushing him away.

Jared places his hand over hers as it lays on his chest, close to his heart.

They both lock eyes- Blue and Green dancing for a beat.

“So… (looking away) what- Kim left you high and dry?” Jared says letting her go and leaning against the wall next to her.

“Not really, I told her to go mingle. I’m just-I was-“

“Waiting for me to come and save you?”

“Exactly,” she laughs smiling.

Jared looks over at her, his eyes wandering.

Maddie notices.

“What?”

Jared fumbles noticing he’s been caught.

“Nothing. You want another drink?”

“Sure,” she says handing him her cup as he walks off, Maddie smiles nervously to herself.

As Maddie watches Jared walk over to a keg and get roped into a conversations with some friends, she rushes over to Kim.

“I’m sorry can I borrow her for just one quick second?” Maddie says to Kim’s latest conquest.

The guy nods with a smile, “I’ll be just a minute,” Kim says smiling and walking off to the side with Maddie.

“I’m sorry but I really need to talk to you.”

“Oh my god, are you kidding, of course, what’s up? Are you ok?”

“I think Jared might be flirting with me.”

Kim laughs.

“I’m serious.”

“Oh sweetie, my flirtatiously challenged friend. He is flirting with you.”

“Really?”

“Yes. Welcome to the party.”

“Oh my god, so he likes me?”

“Yes. It’s really not news anymore at this point, everybody knows.”

“I didn’t know.”

“That’s because you’re oblivious.”

“I think I might like him too.”

Kim’s eyes widen.

“Now that’s new! Really?”

“I don’t know. I think. I mean I’ve never really thought of him like that before.”

“Well think about it now. Are you attracted to him? Does he do it for you?”

“Ah. Oh my god. I can’t do this.”

“Ok look. I’m not going to tell you what I think about this, because I don’t want to put anything in your head. Ride out the rest of the night. Spend some alone time with him, feel it out. If the spark is there, it’s there, you’ll feel it. If not, he’ll always be your friend.”

“Do butterflies count as sparks? Because I gotta say there are some serious butterflies going on right now.”

“You bet your ass they count.” Kim says smiling, “Now go!”

Maddie smiles and walks toward where Jared is with the guys.

Jared sees her and smiles, excusing himself he walks over to her.

“Hey sorry, I kind of got caught up in a bit of a who’s the scariest villain debate?” he says handing her a drink.

“Thanks….that’s easy Freddy Krueger, hands down,” Maddie says.

Jared looks at her and smiles.

“That’s what I said.”

Maddie smiles.

“Hey Maddie, there’s something I’d really like to talk to you about…do you wanna maybe take a walk?”

“Yea-I-Oh no Vinny…”

“What?” Jared says confused.

“Vinny just walked in,” she says her focus shifting.

Jared looks over.

“Of course,” he mumbles to himself.

“Ignore him Maddie,” he says trying to get their moment back.  

Kim rushes over.

“Holy ass face, did you see who just walked din?” she says.

“Yes Kim, thank you, we’ve all noticed,” Jared says annoyed.

Kim notices his frustration.

“You know what, just don’t even pay any mind to him. Don’t even acknowledge he’s here,” Kim says trying to repair the damage.

Maddie shakes it off.

“I can do that. So Jared, how about that walk?”

“Yea. Let’s do it, Ladies first,” he says leaving a path for her to walk first.

Jared holds his hand out behind him as Kim slaps it, he smirks following Maddie toward the front door.

As Maddie passes Vinny, Jared places his hand on the small of her back and she sighs in relief knowing he’s there, but at the same time there go those butterflies fluttering up her spine.

Vinny’s eyes follow Maddie and Jared, he jumps over blocking the exit.

“Maddie, Jesus you look hot how come I never got any of this while we were together!”

Jared’s hold on Maddie tightens as he bulks up ready to say something.

Maddie squeezes his hand to stop him.

“Oh let’s be honest here Vinny, you don’t deserve any of this, your just not man enough to handle it. So do me a favor, walk away, now. Before we have a problem.”

Vinny looks at her baffled as he slinks away.

Maddie grabs Jared’s hand, heading out the front door.

They get about a block away, before Maggie finally speaks.

“I’m sorry about that. He’s such an ass.”

“You don’t have anything to be sorry for. Like you said he’s an ass.”

“I knew I shouldn’t have worn this, I should have just stayed home like a wanted to.”

“Hey. Stop it, (he stops, turning to her he puts his hands on her shoulders) you look amazing. Don’t let him make you feel bad about anything, ever. He’s a piece of crap that wasn’t worth your time.”

“I know. You’re right. It’s just he gets in my head sometimes and I start to question myself.”

“Don’t. Your body is yours. It doesn’t belong to any guy, ever. And just because you wear something slightly different or sexier than usual on the one night of the whole year that the world is allowed to spice it up, doesn’t give him the right to comment on it and make you feel bad or make you question how amazing you look and how amazing you should feel. Cuz you’re perfect. You always have been Maddie. That guy, he’s completely insane for ever letting you go.”

Maddie blushes.

“Thank you, you didn’t have to say that,” she says her eyes nervously looking away.

“I wanted to,” he smiles as they continue to walk a bit more.

A million thoughts are running through Jared’s minds. That was one hell of a speech. Kiss her. Kiss her now, you fool. No. It’s too soon.

“Can I ask you a question?” Maddie says stopping under a weeping willow tree as the fall breeze kisses her cheek, her hair gently blowing.

“Of course,” he says turning toward her, the mere sight causing is heart rate to quicken and his palms to start sweating.

“Will you kiss me?” she says her eyes meeting his as his widen in surprise. “I feel like there’s something here, and I know that we’re friends but we may be more and I won’t know unless you kiss me. I would never want to hurt you by leading you on, so will you just-”

Jared reaches for his cowboy hat, removing it he tosses it to the side quickly as he cups her face and kisses her.

Maddie’s lips are in shock at first, but her response is quick as the spark ignites her lips kissing back softly at first but then finding a more aggressive/urgent groove with Jared’s. As Jared feels her doing so, his hands find her waist, pulling her into him. Her hands gliding up his arms and wrapping around his neck.

The kissing continues for quite a while, as Jared walks Maddie backward until she’s up against the tree bark. Fall leaves dancing in the wind, whirling around them.

Maddie finally breaks the kiss, needing some air.

They both exhale loudly as they lock eyes, they laugh.

“Did that really just happen?” Jared says his eyes twinkling.

“If, not, it was one hell of a dream,” she says smiling as she wipes the corner of her lips.

“I’ve gotten red lipstick all over you,” she laughs reaching up and rubbing her thumb across his lips, trying to get it off.

“That’s ok, I don’t mind.”

Jared looks at her, he takes her hand and places it on his heart.

“Your heart is pounding so fast,” Maddie says with a small chuckle. “You know I kinda felt that happening before too.”

“Yea, that happens a lot when I’m around you.”

Maddie smiles as she pulls him back over to her into a kiss.

Each kiss longer and deeper than the next.

Jared cups her face, he pulls away and looks her in the eyes.

“What?”

“I can’t believe this is happening,” he says continuing to kiss her.

Maddie smiles against his lips as her hands find their place over his on her face.

They continue to lose their breath as Maddie pulls him closer wrapping her arms around him, Jared’s hands fall down her body to her waist as find a place in the back pockets of her fitted black leather pants.

She laughs mid kiss and buries her face in his chest.

“What?” he says confused and pulling away to look at her.

“We’re kissing, you and me. And your hands – well I just never thought they would be- (she laughs) I guess I’m just not used it. I can’t believe we’re doing this. I mean you’ve been my best friend for years. I guess I just feel kind of strange.”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to push- Are we moving too fast? I’m sorry.”

“No, no. I don’t mind. (she says pulling him by the shirt toward her) Come here.”

Jared smiles and continues to kiss her again as they close the space between them.

“So Whattaya say you think you wanna be my girl?” he says looking back at her and whispering to her.

“I thought I already was.”

Jared smiles pulling her to him as he continues to kiss her.

Maddie smiles against his lips as she cups his face, she pulls away looking up at him, “You know as weird as this is, it feels really natural…really right. I could kiss you all night long.”

“Don’t expect me to object to that,” he says cupping her face and kissing her “I’ve waited a long time for you.”

Maddie looks up at him through heavy eyes and sighs sweetly, her lips already reaching for his yet again.

As the two friends become more on a night that had potential to be one of the worst Halloweens ever.  Costumes galore walk by and drinks flow as the party just a few blocks away keeps going the private party under the willow tree had just begun. Jared finally handing his heart to the girl he’s wanted all along breath after breath, kiss after kiss, touch after touch.

After what feels like forever, the two finally come up for air. Maddie’s shoulders shrug as the breeze chills her skin.

“Are you cold, maybe we should get you inside?”

“Sure.”

Maddie smiles and shrugs, walking off toward the party.

Jared smiles watching her, as he grabs his cowboy hat off the floor, his eyes scaling her curvy figure up and down, she spins around and catches him.

“What are you doing?”

“Oh excuse me, I was just admiring my girlfriend.”

“Really. Do you like what you see?”

“Is that even a question?”

Maddie rolls her eyes and smiles as she takes Jared’s hand in hers heading back into the party.

Kim takes notice of the scene in front of her- hand holding, goofy grins, and smudged red lipstick everywhere. She squeals and runs over to them as they talk to each other with lovey dovey eyes.

“You guys finally kissed…didn’t you?”

“Yes.” Maddie says smiling.

“A whole hell of a lot of yes.” he says, his grin as big as hers.

“Oh my god…finally!!!”

“I’m gonna go find a rest room, I’ll find you in a few?”

Maddie nods as Jared smirks, he leans in and kisses her, before walking off.

Maddie looks after him for a beat and then leans against the nearby wall clutching her chest.

“Oh. my. god.” Kim says in shock.

“You don’t even understand. I’m just so happy.” Maddie says looking over at Kim.

“You look happy.”

“I’m still trying to catch my breath.”

“So it wasn’t weird kissing your best and oldest guy friend?”

“No. I mean yea there’s that, but it just felt right and like the most natural progression ever. It’s almost like why haven’t we been kissing each other our whole lives. It’s nice, and it’s nice to feel safe with someone.”

“Good for you, you deserve it.”

“Thank you.” Maddie smiles.

“So there’s a spark, it’s not just convenient. It’s not just a Vinny rebound.”

“Trust me the spark nearly blew my face off ok? Vinny was the last thing on my mind while Jared was kissing me. He’s just so sexy, he has the best lips and his hands…are perfect.”

“I cannot even. This is amazing and he’s such a good guy if you only knew how long he’s had this crush on you…”

“I wish I would have known. I’m actually- I’m gonna go find him, do you mind…”

“No- go find your boyfriend.”

“Thank you,” she smiles rushing off.

**********************************************************************

Maddie finds Jared just coming out of the bathroom, she smiles and stops him, pushing him back in.

“Hey…oh…ok, what’s happening?” he laughs as she locks the door behind them.

“Maddie…what are you doing?” he says laughing.

She pulls him into another kiss, as he deepens it lifting her in his arms slightly as his hands tighten around her waist, her hands cupping his face.

“I’m so lucky, (he says cupping her face as he glances down at her, he sighs looking up at the ceiling in a slight frustration.) But it doesn’t have to be different with us. I mean just because we know each other, I don’t want you to think that I suddenly just expect us to jump into a physical relationship. Because, I mean this is whole new territory for us. I’m ready to court you, and take you on dates, and re-meet your parents and your family as your actual boyfriend. I don’t wanna rush this with you.”

Maddie sighs and kisses him.

“You’re perfect.”

Jared kisses her.

“Go ahead, you go first, I’m gonna need a minute to- cool down,” he says embarrassed.

“Oh. OH! ok,” she says realizing with a laugh.

Just before she turns to unlock the door, Maddie turns back to Jared, she pulls him to her and kisses him softly and slowly as he responds matching the same pace. She looks up at him, “When it does happen, it’s going to be amazing!” she gives him a quick tease like peck as he leans in for more, she smirks up at him and unlocking the door she leaves the room.

Jared stands there laughing to himself.

“Yup, as expected I’m a goner,” he says looking in the mirror.

Maddie stands on the other side of the door her heart pounding in her chest as she clutches it, giving herself a minute to gather her composure, she smiles walking off to find Kim.

-<3-

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  

 

Pause-A Quick Message

Hello lovely readers,

So this message is for anyone who cares, lol. It would appear that I’ve broken a decent posting streak as I failed to post at all last week. I was working on a Halloween story, but that got pushed back in the midst of life’s craziness. And this week is literally the week of my brother’s wedding, so I will not be posting this week either. Ah, things happen. But consistency and this blog mean so much to me, that I hate that this has to be the case. But it is just for a bit. I will be back soon, with some new stories!

Regular Monday & Thursday posting will pick up Monday, November 14th!

Thanks!

And Happy Week to all!

-<3-

Michelle

 

This is my (final) RIOT. [Part 4]

We’ve come to an end on my RIOT, as my anger is starting to slow down a bit and now I am just simply sad. I won’t say that I’m over the loss of two of our favorite characters, but I’ve said all I can say. It’s time to try to move on.

But being that I feel like Abraham’s death was a bit overshadowed, I thought why not shine a light on some of his best one liners. Michael Cudlitz is one hell of an actor, and he was the perfect soldier.

My Fav Abraham-isms!

“Son of a dick.”

“I don’t give a monkey’s left nut.”

“We don’t give two short and curly’s what it looks like.”

“Maybe I’ll let you shave me down all over-Dolphin smooth.”

“I am fit as a damn fiddle.”

“I am stressed and depressed to see that ride die.”

“It’s plain as potatoes to me now.”

“There is no damned corner in this damned earth that has not been dicked hard beyond all damned recognition.”

*His laugh @ 5:20 is epic! He craps me up!*

“You got a shit storm behind door A and a storm of shit behind door B.”

“Who’s Deanna?”

“Mother Dick.”

“Pull the cobwebs outta your ass and move!”

“There’s a vast ocean of shit, that you people don’t know shit about, Rick knows every fine grain of said shit and then some.”

“Cuz loose ends make my ass itch.”

“A man can tell.” *The Sasha saga begins…

“Can you get the gate, appreciate it pal.”

“When you were pouring the Bisquick, where you trying to make pancakes?”

“How long you think Rick and Michonne have been uggin bumpleys?”

“Why are dingleberries brown? It’s just the way shit is.”

“That my friend is some damn fine, Ginuwine, outside the box thinking!”

“You’d have better luck picking up a turd by it’s clean end.”

“What the bitch?!?”

 “Bitch Nuts.”

“It indicates, we are neck deep up shit creek with our mouths wide open.”

And his last scene as Negan looks him in the eye, Abraham bulks up- no fear and as the bat strikes him once, then twice, in between his last breaths he gives us one last stellar zinger.

“Suck. my. nuts.”

RIP Abraham– from the beginning you made us like you, with your soldier trained brain and your tell it like it is -no bullshit dialogue. Most of my laughs while watching the show, have belonged to you. You fought until the very end and we are proud to call you family. I’ll miss you more than you’ll know and more than I thought. Thank you for the laughs and thank you for keeping Glenn company from your first day until both of your last days.

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Also I didn’t notice this, until I saw it pointed out, but OMG that Sasha peace sign shout-out, beautifully heartbreaking. I was really starting to like these two and now we’ll never get to see what could have happened with them, or what would have happened with the Rosita/Abraham/Sasha triangle. There was more story to tell there, for sure. :*( I guess  The Walking Dead  is content with destroying love and relationships.

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Today is the day…The Walking Dead ‘s new episode is on and I don’t know if I’ll be watching live. Part of me wants to, but part of me wants to tell the producers to suck it. Lol. I will see how I feel tonight and see what my family thinks. Regardless of what I choose this Sunday, I am sure this is not the last you will hear from me when concerning The Walking Dead. If nothing else, I’ll be there to support my Maggie girl.

One last final farewell to two fan favorites…#RIP Loves❤

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Stay Glenn my friends, until next time.

*I do not take credit for any videos, gifs, or photos used.*

-<3-

 

 

 

 

 

This is my RIOT. [Part 3]

Some Of My Favorite Glenn Moments

“I delivered pizzas, why?.”- #BOSS

Well walker mishap. -AGAIN… #BOSS

“Hey , hey you in the tank…dumbass, you cozy in there?” -Meet Glenn (this scene makes me want to cry now)

Fast car, fast race.

Chair kill.- #BADASS

Glenn takes his Governor frustrations out on a walker & bitches out Rick for what happened to Maggie.

-This storyline was so interesting to me, it showed a side to Glenn that we’ve scene, but this was an elevated level. Glenn is protective of Maggie, and when he saw her barely clothed and with the Governor, knowing if he tried to save her, they’d both end up dead, he and Maggie end up going through some seriously deep stuff. You really see Glenn’s love and protection for Maggie throughout that storyline.

Aiden knock out.

Nicholas knock out.

“My blood my family is standing right here.” (@0:45)

 

Best Glenn & Maggie Moments

***These fan videos are gorgeous and have a lot of great Gleggie/Glaggie moments.

First time- this is such a brilliant scene, and it’s so sweet and funny.

Clock watch (@4:00) “I love you.” (@6:46)-I love how Glenn realizes the importance of Hershel passing down the watch to him, you can see the tears in his eyes. -I love how he tells her he loves her and how he says “it’s been true for a long time.” And then how he tells Maggie to stop the car and let him drive because he can see how in shock she is. #Gentleman.

Barn full of walkers gun down– “Maggie?” I adore this moment, because it’s as if he’s asking permission, he is hesitant, and doesn’t want to hurt her.

Photograph-This will always be one of my most favorite moments. I love how simple, and normal it is. And I LOVE how she kisses his hand before he leaves.

Green balloons– I love this scene so much because you can just see how deep their connection is, she was waiting for a sign and he knew to send one.

Shower Scene I love this scene because it’s a sweet moment between a loving couple and then you see it kind of take on a more serious tone when Glenn notices Maggie’s bruises feeling the urgency to comfort her. It’s beautiful. 

Baby Glaggie/Gleggie– I can’t. I just can’t.

***There are so many amazing Glenn/Glenn & Maggie moments over the course of the last 6 seasons. Glenn was so full of heart and his relationship with Maggie was one of my favorite parts of the show. I’m a sucker for a good romance story and the fact that the two of them managed to find and fall in love even in this kind of world, was just so beautiful. When Maggie was introduced, I realized that they would be my romantic fix for the show. It saddens me that they will never get to start their family and live a happy life. I know there are many scenes I probably didn’t feature, so feel free to share your favorites below, I’d love to hear them! Just know every minute of their story is amazing and we appreciate the heart and realism Lauren Cohan (Maggie) and Steven Yeun (Glenn) put into their characters. Gleggie/Glaggie Forever.

RIP Sweet Glenn❤

*I do not take credit for any videos used.*

 

This is my RIOT. [Part 2]

****LETTERS OF LOVE & FRUSTRATION-The Walking Dead Edition****

Dear Glenn,

You were a leader, a loyal man of honor. You took whatever came your way and handled your business like a boss, but with an odd heir of grace in a rather grace-less world. You were our heart, our family. And the thought that you will never crack a joke, kiss Maggie, or meet your baby, well it just breaks my heart to pieces.

Glenn- from your first words, “Hey Dumbass” to your last “Maggie…I’ll find you.”- I have never not loved you, believed in you, or trusted you. Unfortunately you were the heart and moral compass of the show that got taken away from us this season and in the very first episode of the season, none the less. You will be greatly missed, there aren’t words to explain just how much. Maggie will never be the same without you, and The Walking Dead will never be the same without you.

You truly were one of my favorites and this to date (and forever) will be one of the most felt Walking Dead deaths ever. I think you deserved better, I think you had more story to tell. I think you would have made an amazing dad. Forever and always, your loyalty, heart, fearlessness, bravery, friendship, love and kindness, will be with us. We love you, we’ll miss you, and….we’ll find you. This isn’t goodbye it’s see you later.

RIP GLENN Love you, forever.❤ #Family

 

Dear Steven Yeun,

I hope you know how much we love you. How deeply your portrayal of Glenn as impacted millions of us. I already miss seeing you on my tv screen every Sunday night. And I wish you the best of luck on future projects. Can’t wait to follow your career. But to me, you’ll always be my Glenn.

 

Dear Abraham,

Thank you for rocking the trendiest mustache ever, for being a sassy ginger, for having the best southern accent, and for- my favorite of all- thank you for the countless hysterical zingers. You brought a little laughter to a very dark world, and we will miss your leadership, and your safe soul.

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Dear Michael Cudlitz,

Thank you for being your bad-ass self and for honoring your fans to the very end of your Abraham journey. The next show or film to get you, is very lucky. I’ll be watching for you.😀

 

Dear Maggie/Lauren Cohan,

You got this. We got you. Hand in hand we walk.

baby-glaggie

Dear Scott Gimple and Robert Kirkman,

A little something comes to mind…oh yea that’s right…

Dear Daryl,

I love you, I love your southern slang & twang, your ability to own any situation, your worldly training and variety of skills, your fashion sense😉, your tough guy exterior and most of all your big ole heart of gold. The guilt of causing Glenn’s death will probably get you killed this season, but I hope you kick some serious ass before you go. (Please don’t go!)

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Dear Norman Reedus,

<33333333333….

Hearts, hearts for days.

*****************************************************************

Here are some images from my Walking Dead Season 7 premiere party…you know before my heart was ripped out of my chest.

This table scape is also perfect for Halloween!

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This is a chocolate two layered cake with butter cream frosting and crushed Oreos in the center, surrounded by crumbled Oreos again and gummy worms, topped with a raspberry/jello/cool whip concoction as the “brain.” It looks kinda like a heart. #SorryNotSorry Lol.

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I used red “fruit punch” flavored Gatorade for the Walker Blood and Lollipops for the Walker Claws. (my brother found them at the dollar tree they are originally called zombie fingers!)

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Death Predictions :*/

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Seconds before watching the premiere…

 

 

DISCLAIMER:

I’m going to be posting quite a few things about The Walking Dead this weekend, my usually scheduled Monday post, was a no go. It was just too soon for me to fully write up and process all that I had to say. I tried, but it wasn’t ready.  I will fill out the rest of this week with new posts. I need to get them all written and ready and then I will post accordingly. I need to get it all out, by week’s end, because then I can hopefully start to heal and move on. This is my venting. I hope you understand, fan to fan.😀 If you aren’t a Walking Dead fan or you disagree with my thoughts, come back soon for a different vibe. Right now this is my RIOT time. xoxo

*I do not take credit for any images/gifs used is the first portion of the post.*

*All premiere party photos are my own.*

-<3-

This is my RIOT. [Part 1]

THE INTRODUCTION

I’ve been avoiding finishing writing this all week. Partly because I can already tell it’s going to be a tall order/one of those really long ranty posts and partly because I just don’t know how to start this. It’s not that I don’t have anything to say, I have a whole hell of a lot to say. But I guess that’s the problem. It’s just that the idea of thinking about it again, is stirring up some emotional anxiety in me already. But my hope is that once I get all the feels out, I will feel better, and start to heal. It’s happened for me in the past.

I know at this point you are probably very confused…allow me to explain.

It’s just a show, they say. Don’t take it too seriously. Get over it. But to us- to a lot of us-it’s more than that. When you watch a show for 6 seasons, you learn and grow with the characters, you care about them, you are invested in their stories and want to know more. They become like parts of your family.  Our Sunday night family. Yes, I’m referring to Rick and the gang from AMC’s The Walking Dead.

[SPOILERS AHEAD!!!!!!!!!!]

Now I know there are many different opinions floating around by now, and I may be late to the game, but I just couldn’t finalize my thoughts until recently. Even now I still feel like I’m all over the place and it’s been a few days since the episode aired. But it left one hell of an imprint on my mind and my heart. And not in a good way.  

This past Sunday night was the premiere episode of Season 7, entitled “The Day Will Come When You Won’t Be.” It’s an episode we fans have been anxiously awaiting since last season’s majorly talked about cliffhanger. And let it be known that even though I was mad at first, I defended the cliffhanger and thought it was badass and creative. I believed in the show that I love. The show that I love to watch with my family. The show I schedule my Sundays around. I believed they wouldn’t let me down. I trusted them. But what I got, was nothing I hoped for. In fact it was just the opposite.

In a nut shell. Let’s just say, I am NOT happy with the outcome.

THE FEELS ARE IN THE DETAILS

What I feared the most came true. A very beloved character was on the receiving end of Negan’s power trip of a batting practice. Glenn Rhee was killed. (Along with Sgt. Abraham Ford) And the fact that I just put Abraham’s death in parenthesis as a morbid side note, should tell you just how badly they screwed up.

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There I said it. But what frustrates me so much is that it was done in such a bull shit, shock value, careless way. I say careless because I just feel like the producers have little regard for their audience. And I may just be talking out of anger right now, but that’s how I feel. Right now and for the days that have passed, this is how I feel. Chris Hardwick made an incredible point on The Talking Dead, validating any and all of our feelings, whether we are pissed, sad, or happy, because we are the passionate fans who make the show. And we love him for that and for being our full on therapist.

My thoughts are a scramble, still. As I sit here and try to edit myself and categorize my thoughts. But should I edit myself? Should I sugar coat anything? Show runners and AMC sure as hell don’t sugar coat anything for us. So should fans not be allowed the same curtesy? Should we not be allowed to speak our minds about a show that holds such a sacred place in our hearts?

I have so much inside and I don’t know how to say it. The gnawing feeling in my chest and stomach, and the feeling of puffy eyes is enough proof that Sunday night’s episode put me through a rollercoaster of emotions. I feel like I was anxious the night before the premiere, (waking up after bad dreams) and then I was nervous the whole day-dodging people with spoilers, and then after it happened I went from shocked, to pissed (some serious vulgar language was thrown left and right in my house hold that’s for sure), to balling my  eyes out. I actually have a video, my brother took of me. It’s too much for me to actually post, but let’s just say I was red faced. And that was after the episode, I just thought of Glenn’s face just before Negan lowered the bat. He was just sitting there, he wasn’t doing anything wrong, sure he had his outburst, but that wasn’t nearly as bad as Daryl’s. Glenn was just there. My brother put it perfectly, “he was an innocent.” And then WHACK. Reimagining that image, that thought, made me explode in tears, causing a bit of a domino effect in my house as my mom and sister in law began to get teary eyed and my brother jumped over to hug me. He and I are both completely messed up over this. We’re both just pissed and when my sister in law tried to be the voice of reason and ask us “Would you have rather seen him die getting ripped to pieces by walkers.” We both answered with a forceful YES in unison. Walkers eat people, it’s what they do. It’s what we know from this world, and that does become exciting and a bit of an adrenaline boost. But having one man bash the skull in of another man, is just not what I want or need to see. AMC- the same network that won’t allow the F word, but yet allowed that horrific imagery to be displayed for the world to watch. Yea that makes total sense.

I am not denying the cinematic genius of the show. The angles and the way it was shot was amazing- the POV shots- really were so interesting. And I know how well this show can be done, I’ve seen it in the past. But this week’s content…heartbreaking…too heartbreaking.

MANIPULATION GONE TOO FAR/THE BAIT & SWITCH TECHNIQUE

And that’s the problem, with this whole death scene. After going through all that wait and worry, I would have just rather they killed him last season. Instead we waited months for that bait and switch, shock value bull shit. I was a wreck last season when we had to deal with Glenn’s fake death, but I put my faith in the fact that Glenn had so much story left to tell and that he couldn’t be gone, and he wasn’t. But now after having to go through all that, and then the 6 month summer hiatus- to have it actually result in a Glenn death…Pure BULL SHIT. And because of that same need for shock value, they killed Abraham first to throw us off and totally didn’t allow his character to have his own meaningful death. His death was cast to the side, and completely overshadowed, because when you peg a supporting character death against a main character death, that supporting character isn’t cared about as much. And although Abraham is beloved in his own right his longevity on the show doesn’t compare to Glenn’s, so which death is being most talked about, Glenn’s. Although Abraham’s death was mighty and had purpose and he went out without fear and still his strong self, it fell to the side. If you ask me he deserved his own death. He shouldn’t have been a lead up or a manipulative fake out for Glenn’s horrific death.

I understand fans of the comics wanted this scene. They wanted the gore- the blood, the guts. But fans of the show, did not. Because although many fans overlap between the genres, fans of solely the show have become so undeniably attached to the original Atlanta 5 that, we hate to even consider the possibility of the show going on without them. Secondary characters are all up for grabs, but DO NOT MESS WITH MY GLENN. This so called “iconic” comic scene was ruined. I could give two shits about the comic scene, I don’t follow them and I don’t see that death as iconic at all. It’s disturbing and removes one of my favorite charcters from this world I’ve grown to follow intently. I just think the death should match the character. Yes in a way, Abraham’s did. He was staring Negan down, in a “take me” sort of fashion. Even during his death he still gave us one of his epic one liners and told Negan- “suck my nuts.” It was oddly funny and badass as hell. But Glenn’s death- it went unjustified, the purpose fell flat. It was out of nowhere. If they wanted to make it Glenn they should have just showed us it in the finale, at least then it would have been an instant shock and the wait wouldn’t have been for nothing. And the recovery period would be given proper time.

But no they had to do their whole little dance to make us think they maybe just maybe weren’t going to follow the comic.

I get it’s a zombie apocalypse show, I get that people have to die. I get that that in order for things to keep going and to keep things interesting with a realistic heir, main characters need to die to impact a greater story. But as a fan, I just think that this particular death was ruined. And whatever story they tell going forward could have still been accomplished if they hadn’t chosen Glenn.  

DARYL’S TO BLAME

I know that the way Glenn died on the show, is how he died in the comics. I understand that. But considering the show varies from the comic quite often, they didn’t have to have it be Glenn. And to have Abraham be the initial victim on the receiving end of Lucille, (the Point of View shot was in fact him and not Glenn) and give us this sense of relief, all to have Daryl have an outburst lunging at Negan and swinging at him, causing Negan to get pissed. Further stating the fact that he is a man of his word- the first outburst was free but any others and he would “shut that shit down.” In my head it made sense (although it pains me to say this) for Negan to kill Daryl. But no instead he pivots after bashing Abraham’s head in and whacks poor innocent Glenn over the head out of nowhere. I’m a Daryl fan, I am, but even so I am dead ass saying that if it weren’t for Daryl’s outburst, Glenn would still be alive. So not only did they make us think it was Daryl with the clips released, they then death layered Abraham and Glenn- and further pinning two crowd favorites against each other-Daryl and Glenn, by having Daryl be the cause of Glenn’s death.

The scene itself was heart breaking and gut wrenching. In an odd way I felt like I was prepping for it to be Daryl, but I thought they weren’t going to go that far, so when I saw it was Abraham there was an instant relief, because although I love him and his crazy sayings that always crack me up, I knew I could recover from his death versus trying to recover from a main core character death. The original Atlanta five that were left. But when I saw that it was Abraham, I knew it wasn’t over. I sensed it, I felt it in the pit of my stomach and then …it happened. The worst decision The Walking Dead ever made. I had tried so hard to stay away from spoilers, but I did watch the promo clips and the sneak peek. And all signs were intentionally pointing to Daryl. Dwight wearing his vest, riding his motorcycle, carrying his cross bow. And then in the sneak peek where we see the brain remains on the ground you see a blanket on the floor near it, the blanket we all knew Daryl had draped around his shoulders.

As much as I love Daryl- he is really one of my favorites- I cannot choose between my love for him and my love for Glenn. My sister in law asked me who would I rather it be, Glenn or Daryl and I told her she couldn’t ask me that question because I couldn’t give her an answer, I couldn’t choose. I had three characters I did not want touched, excluding Rick because I knew he was alive because of the sneak peek, and killing him would defeat the point of the idea that the producers and writers have been stressing, that this season is about breaking Rick down. My three favorites; Daryl, Maggie and Glenn. And when I got wind of people having spoilers and telling me I was going to be a wreck, I began to really worry it was Daryl, so I was prepping for Daryl, hoping it would be a secondary character, because fans would freak the F out if it were Daryl. But in that prepping, the Glenn death knocked the wind out of me. Even though his death was written the same in the comic (excluding the Abraham kill and the Daryl outburst) I didn’t think they were going to do it. I thought it was too expected. I thought/kind of hoped it was going to be Michonne. See my reasoning HERE.

Shock value. That’s all this episode was. I do not feel justified at all. The wait, the cliffhanger, the almost death of Glenn last season that freaked everyone the F out, all- for nothing. All to be thrown away in less than 30 minutes. They knew they would get shit for this, which is why they made it happen in the premiere and not the finale, because they’re going to try to use this season as a way to redeem their bullshit.

THE FANDOM AND WHAT LIES AHEAD

I’m a huge fan of the show, which is why I feel so deeply and strongly about all this. I may just be coming off as a bitter fan who didn’t get what she wanted. Or a bitchy fangirl who is pissed one of her favorite characters got killed off. But it’s more than that to me. It’s the way he was killed off, and the lack of respect we were shown as viewers who have been so faithful for the past 6 seasons. No matter what the story they want to tell after this, nothing can convince me it was worth Glenn’s death. In fact I believe the story would have been made greater had they kept Glenn alive. He’s had to endure so much death over the past season. Noah getting ripped to pieces by walkers, Nicholas shooting himself, all right in front of his eyes. That is traumatizing, and I would have loved to have seen how he handled that, and how he would have dealt with killing humans on a greater scale to protect his family. I’m a big believer in seeing a show through. But if I’m being honest, after that episode I just felt done. The need to watch any future episodes keeps moving further and further away from me, there isn’t an urgency like there used to be. There’s a feeling of betrayal.  Because I just don’t want to see a Walking Dead world where Glenn doesn’t exist. And to make things worse they gave us that bull shit “what could have been” dream sequence family dinner, where Glenn is holding his son as Maggie and Abraham sit next to him smiling and everyone else passes dinner plates and talking happily like one big family. Twist the knife even more, Scott Gimple. What the hell was that? I don’t know where my heart lines right now. I’m on the fence. I can’t say I won’t ever tune in again, because I still care about the other characters, but I just don’t think I will be as adamant about watching it live. I may just stick to catching it on demand. I don’t know. I reserve the right to change my mind, but for right now that’s how I feel. I wish all fans felt the same, so the showrunners/producers/writers could realize they screwed up big time this time, and to stop taking our trust in them for granted.

HERE is a really great read about others who feel strongly about whether or not they will continue to watch and support the show. I can’t say I don’t agree with some of their reasoning, there’s a lot of truth and facts to back it up.

GLENN’S FINAL WORDS

“Maggie…I’ll find you.” One final promise of protection. A vow to always continue to look and find her no matter where he is, or where she/their baby are. As beautiful as they were, I can’t. I don’t even want to relive this. Not to mention how gruesome and gory that scene was. Did you catch how once it happened the Glenn body was seldom shown, especially when Maggie crawls over, you only see her reactions to it, they are never fully in the same frame. Yea Gimple, you know what you did.

FUTURE VIEWERSHIP/MAGGIE & GLENN HISTORY

The writers and producers keep saying things like “this episode wasn’t about who was on the receiving end of the bat, it was about the impact it has on Rick and how to break a man down.” But to the fans, that’s all that mattered. And the cliffhanger made that so. I understand that Rick (& Co.) had begun to get too cocky. And I understand Negan saying that Rick wasn’t getting it, he wasn’t fearing Negan the way he should. Basically Negan wants Rick to be his bitch and like it. But let’s be clear Rick was still not acting as Negan wanted even AFTER he killed both Abraham and Glenn. It wasn’t until Negan nearly forced him to cut Carl’s arm off that he was finally satisfied with the fear and fully defeated look on Rick’s face.

So the question begs, why Glenn? Why did it HAVE to be Glenn? Maggie is pregnant. They were trying to build something. They are the driving romantic force of the show, the light at the end of a very dark tunnel. Not to mention how much love and faith went into their trying to get back to each other after last season’s “Is he or isn’t he alive” saga. They barely got any actual screen time together in season 6, I wonder how she even got pregnant in the first place since they were barely ever together. In fact many of the seasons were about splitting them up and then having them find each other again somehow. Relying on their unspoken connection as husband and wife. Up until season 6 Glenn hadn’t even killed a human. He was a leader, a loyal man of honor. He took whatever came his way and handled his business like a boss, but with an odd heir of grace in a rather grace-less world. He was our heart. He was our family. And the thought that he will never crack a joke, kiss Maggie, or meet his baby, well it just breaks my heart to pieces.

THE FUTURE OF MAGGIE GREENE (-RHEE)

I’m hearing that this storyline is to set the stage for Maggie to become badass, but she was always badass. She was even the only one to say that they had to fight Negan after Glenn’s death. She fought through crippling pain and shock. How she stayed put and silent throughout her husband’s death is beyond me. I expected more of a reaction I think, but if I gather her condition and her physical exhaustion and pain, she was probably in complete shock and couldn’t move. Her reaction after Negan’s crew leaves and they can finally speak and comfort each other is what kicked off the tears for me. The initial hit was too much of a shock. So I guess you can say we had the same emotional roller coaster as Maggie herself. Maggie is the first to make a move and the first to want to make plans for retaliation, begging her friends to leave and go back, worrying that they were only out there for her. Maggie saying that she’s taking him (Glenn’s body) with her. That’s when I really started to break down, seeing her heartbreak and feeling her pain. Lauren Cohan slayed it! I truly can’t wait till this Negan dick dies, and I pray that it’s Maggie that gets to do the honors. And if they think they are going to kill this Glaggie baby, they better think twice! Because I wasn’t ready for Glenn to die and if they let this baby die now too, it’s just as worse. Maggie has lost everything, she doesn’t need to lose her baby too, and the last piece of Glenn she has left. Ughhh why didn’t SHE ever take a picture of HIM. Oh I hate this, his baby is never even going to get to see what his/her dad looked like. I can’t. I can’t do this. I don’t want to do this. Can I be done now? Can this be done, can the show be done, I need a minute. This should have been the season finale last year, 6 months would have been a good recovery period.

ACTOR REACTIONS

If you ask me the actors are too cool about this whole thing. Steven Yeun was all game for it and that kind of saddens me, why do you want to leave us? Sometimes fans just need to feel like you care. And I know he does, but can’t you just be as pissed off as us. Screw respecting the story or respecting your bosses, tell me how you really feel. You’re leaving the people and the place you’ve called home for 6 years, how are you not more upset? Or are you just really good at holding it in?

Can’t Steven Yeun (Glenn) and Lauren Cohan (Maggie) just cry tears the way Emily Kinney did when Beth died and she was on The Talking Dead? Or how Lauren cried when Scott Wilson’s character Hershel who played her father, died.  Can’t you just be here with us! We need that. #THANKGODFORCHRISHARDWICK

Michael was also on E! News and his interview was just so good… so Thank you Michael! Thank you for getting it and us! (and for keeping the stache, he said he’s keeping it for the fans for a while, he says he understands there is a morning period for us.)

I don’t know maybe it’s because they’ve known for so long and they’ve already moved on. Maybe it’s because it’s just a job to them, and it’s time to move onto new adventures. But it just doesn’t feel like they were as emotional as the fans were. Ugh I don’t know I must be going through something serious right now. I’m checking their social sites, like TALK TO ME!!! #PMS #IBLAMEYOU

What’s worse is that producers Scott Gimple and Robert Kirkman, sit in their stuffy little seats with pusses on their faces the whole time on The Talking Dead trying to justify their choices without actually speaking any words worth listening to. #NOSCRATCHTHAT #GIMPLEANDKIRKMANIBLAMEYOU They don’t apologize, or sympathize with their audience ever. Quite frankly they annoy the crap out of me. Cocky people annoy me. It is my biggest pet peeve.

Just let Greg Nicotero do all the interviews, him I actually like. And he makes the sickest walkers come to life. (Although that Glenn death imagery I could have done without, but he didn’t write the scene, so I can forgive you.)😉

I miss the old seasons, when the only thing our group had to fear were the walkers.

CONCLUSION

I don’t know what else to say, or what else to think. I’ve rambled on for pages, and I feel like I was an emotional mess and nothing got across the way that I wanted it to. I love the show, I love the characters, and I want to see what happens next and what happens when Negan finally gets his. But I just can’t stomach thinking about the show without Glenn, my eyes borderline tears every time I even think about it. I am still in shock. It’s a circle of denial. It’s the 5 stages of grief. I’ve felt weird these past few days-like I’ve been in an alternate universe, just floating about. It took me a good week to digest and recover from the cliffhanger of Season 6 finale, I was obsessed. So now that I know Glenn was one to go, it may take me longer to recover from.

Anyway I’m going to go before, I start to get emotional again. I realize I probably talked in a circular repetition and may have even contradicted myself, but this is where I am after Sunday night’s game changer. A state of anger, sadness, and confusion. Acceptance is a long way off. I hope you can see where I’m coming from as a fan. It’s hard. It’s going to be really hard. Fan girl life sucks.

GOODBYE…SEE YOU LATER

Glenn– from your first words, “Hey Dumbass” to your last “Maggie…I’ll find you.”- I have never not loved you, believed in you, or trusted you. Unfortunately you were the heart and moral compass of the show that got taken away from us this season and in the very first episode of the new season, none the less. I can’t even fathom watching the show without you. You will be greatly missed, there aren’t words to explain just how much. Maggie will never be the same without you, and The Walking Dead will never be the same without you.

RIP GLENN Love you, forever.❤ #Family

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-<3-

What’s In My Purse?-Pumpkin Picking Edition

As you may have read in my Monday post, I went pumpkin picking with my family this past weekend. Read my FALL HAUL.

I was switching over my purse to my work bag, when I realized how much crap I actually carried with me on that day. And it sparked an idea for a what’s in my purse post.

Let’s start with the bag itself- I went with my good, old, trusty, no name brand, big, cross body, sack bag. It’s a neutral brown which goes with a lot and it fits a ton of stuff.

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Now for the contents….a.k.a my whole life #BraceYourselves it’s a lot of stuff!

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From Left to Right:

Digital Camera– because sometimes cell phones suck!

Cellphone– because duh?

Alcohol wipes– because you never know if you get a cut and need to clean it out.

Toilet Seat covers To Go– because I knew I was going to be dealing with porta potties. #EW

Cleansing wipes– because again…porta potties.

Hand Sanitizer– because there was a petting zoo-Lol. #AndImAGermaphobe

Tissues– for the fall sniffles.

Wallet-because moneyyyy.

Eye glasses– because sometimes I need them.

Mints, toothpicks, and gum– because they are always good to carry. #KeepingItFresh #KeepingMeSane

House keys– because duh?😉

Oil blotting sheets– shout out to my oily skin girls! #IFeelYourPain #TheStruggleIsReal

A Hair Tie– because sometimes fall weather gets confused.

A Water Bottle– because long drives, and lots of walking.

Spray Bottle– just in case you need a little spritz and refresher.

Bag of lollipops, sour balls, jolly ranchers, cough drops– because of the fall throat tickles/car rides #PeopleGetCarSick

Granola Bars– because it was a long day, and if I needed a boost I was prepared.

Lipstick, chapstick, a mirror– because girly junk #cute😉

Pads/Liners– because girl, you should always be prepared.

Tea bag holder– because yes, I travel with my own tea.

Pepto Bismol, Tylenol, Tums– because I’m a pharmacy. (I actually helped a cousin who had a headache, see my neuroticness pays off.)😉

A notepad & pen– because I’m a writer.

Band-Aids– because you ever know.

Lotion– because everyone loves moisturized hands. Haha.

Headphones– because music.

Sunglasses– because sun beams are still kicking.

My outfit:

Jeans & a Tee

Comfortable Sneakers

A Flannel

A soft fuzzy vest

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*Perfect for removing layers and being comfy on a long drive and a long day with a lot of movement and walking.

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*All photos are my own.*

-<3-