The Hardest Thing

So as I mentioned I’m graduating in a mere few weeks and it’s getting pretty crazy. I’ve just been finishing all my assignments, especially my senior thesis which was one hell of a long haul! But now that I’ve finally completed it I can safely say I gave it my all, and in the end that’s all you can really do. If you would have told me it would have come out the way that it did I would have never believed it, and I’m really happy that I created something that I can really be proud of.  Anyway…needless to say that is why I’ve been slightly MIA. And I mean I don’t know if that matters to any of you out in cyberspace, but I do hope those who read along enjoy what you read! lol So with that said here it goes…

 

“The Hardest Thing”

It’s the hardest thing

Emotion

The deepest feelings one ever feels

It’s the hardest thing

Devotion

To honor a life long commitment to someone you adore

It’s the hardest thing

Creation

To ignite your soul and awaken your spirit

It’s the hardest thing

Motivation

To step out of a rut that’s gone on far too long

It’s the hardest thing

Adaptation

Adding new challenges to a routine life

It’s the hardest thing

Destination

Achieving your true potential and chasing your dreams

It’s the hardest thing

Life…to get past all the world’s obstacles

It’s the simplest thing

Life… as long as you live it for you

Often times I feel like we lose focus, and we worry too much about what other people may think of us or whether or not we’re good enough and we lose opportunities when we have them. And that essentially becomes the root of life’s obstacles. When in reality life is just life, there are amazing days, and there are shitty days. There are moments where you wish you could freeze time, and then there are moments were you feel like you’re drowning. But life is only as complicated as we make it. It can be really simple, as long as you live it for you. That’s not to say, you should become arrogant or insensitive to other people’s feelings and dreams. But when the world seeps into your life and gets into your head and begins to distort your heart and your perception of yourself that’s when you know you need to take a step back and make some changes. That’s when you know you need to put yourself first. Because at the end of the day if you can’t trust yourself how can you trust anyone else?

“Leave you with that thought bitches!” haha sorry inside joke between me and my friends, seemed fitting 😀

#HappyTuesday

-<3-

Follow your <3…Sooner than Later

I guess trusting your gut is always the best option

Denial is a 3 letter word…

R-U-N

That stomach never settles

You think its nerves

But its so much more

Your body’s telling you something

RUN

At a time when you want to take chances

at a time when you’re tired of over thinking

Remember…Trust Yourself

No one knows you better

and if the situation calls for it

RUN

Sooner than Later

Safer than Sorry

And once you listen to that voice inside you heart

you’ll be ok

All can be forgiven

and that running will just be a fragment of your imagination

Run Girl Run

Sooner than Later

Safer than Sorry

-<3-

Future Grad….

??????????So today I picked up my cap and gown.  And although its a pretty awesome feeling, and I’ve been harping on the fact that I can’t wait to be rid of all this college stress. (I’m convinced College Senioritis is the worst level there is!) But even so, I still found myself feeling quite sad on the train ride home, staring out the window at the passing train aside mine, thinking and thinking.  I always feel like I just seem to be settling into some form of who I hope to be just as I’m ending a major chapter in my life. And just as that happens I’m thrust into the next chapter with little preparation. I feel that college is what you make of it, and granted I would feel that way wherever I chose to attend college.

But I see these 4 years go by and it makes me start to reflect on what I accomplished, and whether or not it was enough. And I have to say I guess I could have done more.  Academically, I think I’ve held a pretty good stride…(dean’s list…Holllla)  but socially I definitely could have afforded to join a club and stick to it. I guess I’m not really a join a club kinda girl, I wrote for the newspaper for a while and then stopped. I felt like my time with it was up. It’s strange I tend to let things go when I know I have to start over soon. But I’ve met some great professors that will always stay in my mind, and I’ve met friends that have helped me navigate all the complications of being a communications major! lol…those are the things I will never forget. Besides graduating college, and knowing you’ve finished all those years of education is freaking fantastic! And hell a College Graduation is one hell of a reason to party….bring on the alcohol!!!!! 😀

Oh and just in case you doubt my scholarly abilities…

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I be on my Cap & Gown Shit 😉

 

Final Countdown… a little under 3 weeks!!!!

#HappyWednesday

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-<3-

Dear Future Self

As I grow older, I notice how easy it is to lose yourself when trying to navigate becoming who you hope to be. Like most girls, I am a severe over analyzer, and it is a HUGE pain in the ass. But I’m trying to focus on the now more.

 

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See the situation for what it truly is

Not for what it should be

Not for what it could be

But for what it is

What the world is

What you are

And what your heart leads you to be

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-<3-

Wise Words

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Sometimes it’s frustrating being a writer. I use that term because I feel it’s the only way I can truly define myself. I say it, because I love to write. But sometimes you have to let yourself breathe. Not everything you write will be perfect, there is always room to edit. But what I have learned from blogging, and from having professors give me feedback on my work, is that you shouldn’t worry so much about what you’re writing, just let it happen, and go where it takes you. Sometimes I’ll hit a block and I won’t know how to finish a script, or a poem, and in a way I think it means that it’s time to let that piece of work breathe. Going back to it with a fresh mind, truly makes all the difference, and if you don’t come back to it, maybe it wasn’t worth pursuing. Or sometimes, your mind takes time to process the things you need to say, the things you’re scared to say. For a long time, most of my writing, stayed hauled up in journals and on my computer, scripts went unread. But lately I’ve been trying to get my work out there a little more. And although I know there are still so many things to be done, blogging has truly helped. Writing releases the mind, and unclogs the soul. And whether my blog reaches 5 people or 500, I don’t care much because regardless of that fact, I’m doing this for me. I’m doing it to better my writing, the more I continue to write, the better I feel I get. Cliche as it is… practice does really make perfect.

My mom recently said:

“Blog for you”

and so I think I will… Thanks mom ❤

I guess it’s true what they say…wisdom comes with age…haven’t you noticed how moms are always right? 😉

-<3-

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This is the story of a girl…

So we’ve all heard this story about a guy and a girl

It’s the oldest story in the world

The guy was well-known for being a ladies man

harboring a wandering eye

And the girl, well she was just looking for love

She tries and she tries

and it’s just miss after miss

And then one day the two meet

You knew it was coming

At first she plays hard to get

But he keeps at it, persistence is his specialty

she becomes his latest challenge

Every love story starts this way doesn’t it?

And cliché as it is

The girl always falls for it

The universe tricks her into thinking she can change him

That she will somehow be the one girl who makes the guy truly understand

what it means to be in love

That she is worth it

Worth it enough to stop him from being a complete ass

and shape the hell up

And maybe for a little while she does

But then again we all know how that story ends, don’t we?

Its sad to say but people rarely ever change

“You are who you are

and it’s probably who you’ve always been”

– (One tree hill)

I have this reoccurring image of a girl being interviewed

She’s young and vibrant and she sits across a recording camera

and the interviewer asks her

“So what did you do this summer?”

and she simply says

“What did I do this summer?…This Summer…I fell in love”

with a big smile on her face

and then suddenly it dulls a bit and fades

And she adds

“I mean we’re no longer together, I got my heart broken…but that’s ok, I kind of expected it anyway”

She’s not bitter

She’s learned so much

And in a way she’s learning more about who she is

and just how much she can handle

and how much she’s truly worth

I imagine that’s what love truly does

Well that was an mindful huh? Kind of heavy for a blog post (but whatever)… This comes from watching wayyyy too many soap operas and tv dramas…. but Heyy it was a hell of a lot of fun writing it 😉 If writing wasn’t fun for me, I wouldn’t even care to do it. In fact  I imagine this is how artists write their songs…sometimes you have to write about the hurtful stuff  in order to eliminate the bitterness that accompanies it.  Sometimes you have to have a humorous approach, and know that it’s ok to laugh at yourself. That’s the only way to get through life…um what do you think Cry Me a River was written for? Duh? I guess it all really does circle back to Justin Timberlake for me HAHA… Writing is like a free form of therapy, that you’re in charge of, and for me, I consider that a pretty awesome reward.

Happy Weekend

-<3-