So as time is passing on I am slowly beginning to be able to gain a more humorous approach to this so called “break” I have been trying to accomplish, from my once super icon Justin Timberlake. And by trying, I mean I haven’t done the best job. The truth is our “break” didn’t last very long, (at most a week, at least a day… it’s all a blur.) His music (and yes I include *NSYNC in that) is back on my ears, his name on my lips, and his pictures and career updates on my electronics and my radar yet again. I just can’t help it! I’m a fan!
That’s the thing when you love someone for their overall entertainment; you learn to accept the good and the bad. Although that “bad” is still in the back of my mind, I forgive but I don’t forget…its part of being a woman! Let me hear it ladies…. 😉 And needless to say, I meant everything I said in those other posts, he was wrong and acted like an ass, and I will call him on it, (and I was pissed so there’s that…) the best writing comes from fierce emotion, lol.
I also consulted (yes consulted as if we’re colleagues in life) with a good friend of mine on the issue (yes it’s a grave issue) of “Fangirlin'” and she made me realize that it isn’t all in my head. My friend Michelle is a serious Jonas Brothers Fan, and I mean SERIOUS as serious as I am a J.T. fan she is a J.B. fan. Only difference is, if one pisses her off, she’s got 2 more to fall back on.
Joe Jonas is her favorite and she informed me that when there were certain rumors (or not really just rumors) or bad vibes following him and the choices he was making, she switched to fangirling over Kevin Jonas for the better part of an 8 month period. Which I found hysterical, but actually pretty normal considering when I was younger I switched over to JC, when Justin decided to rock those massive curls turned corn rows. Like seriously? Damn I was a shallow 10 year old, my apologies! 😉
Anyway…Michelle had the right idea, when you really are a fan of an artist, and they make you question why, it hurts and sometimes you need to remove yourself from a hurtful situation in order to cope. I’m aware of the fact that not all of you fangirl, so I am definitely sounding like a lunatic to most. But I could care less! Fangirlin’ is my thing, at least I’m not smoking crack, give me a break! Lol. 😛
The only fault with Michelle’s plan, for me that is; there is no other Justin. Now don’t get me wrong the reunion of *NSYNC, has reconnected me with my favorite boy band (not that I ever really need an excuse to blast my *NSYNC playlist), and I am now totally falling in love with Lance Bass, but let’s be honest I’m not exactly his type, haha. I guess that’s why Lance gets it…he gets us crazy *NSYNC fans. He knows how to talk us down, and give us hope. And pretty sure he’s the one operating and updating the *NSYNC twitter account, he’s adorbs (and is gonna make the best hubby ever, congrats on your engagement handsome!).
Never the less, I’ll always keep the *NSYNC boys on my radar, but now that Justin is solo, there is no other equivalent. No suitable replacement. Just before J.T. made his big comeback, I tried falling for the young Justin; Bieber. And for a while I have to admit, I was smitten, even saw him in concert! But now he’s acting up and I’m just not about to worry about dealing with that crap, lol.
Ok went off on a tangent there…where was I…oh right, this whole concept where you whole-heartedly support everything an artist does, because you care, and you kind of slap this ever glowing halo on them where you think they can do no wrong. And in some strange way they become part of your world, part of your family.
Everyone in my family knows I’m a Justin Timberlake fan; it’s just a known fact. I get texts from family members when he’s on TV just to make sure I’m watching, (I’m usually already watching, but that’s beside the point). They just know! The point is when you love someone’s work so much; the love extends to who they are. And I do love Justin (Timberlake). He’s kind of always been there, (minus that 7 year break where no one knew what cave he was hiding in, like seriously dude don’t ever leave me for that long again). He’s been a constant, someone I’ve grown up with.
I’ve seen him make his way fumbling through the weirdness of being a young man in the public eye along with the rest of *NSYNC. I’ve watched painfully as he broke away from *NSYNC and held my breathe praying for his safe return. I’ve watched him deal with heartbreak at its worst when he and Britney Spears called it quits. I’ve seen his phases go from boy band front-man, to R&B Michael Jackson infused Justification of heartbreak stage, to the anti/epitome of pop where he made sex turn into love sounds through music, to his latest work which blends all those mentioned into one. I’ve seen him mold into an actor from roles in “The Social Network” “Friends with Benefits” and “Trouble with the Curve,” amongst other films. I’ve watched him grow into his 30’s and become a married man, (despite my objections) sorry jess. 😉 I guess that’s my point… that because of this journey, I know that I have to keep this relationship going. Because if I don’t, well let’s be honest there’s no way I can turn my back on him now, it’s just getting good! (Seriously seeing him with a wedding ring on, is HOT, can’t wait to see him when he’s a dad!) I’m way too invested in all that is Justin Timberlake, but whatever, I gather I’m not the only one.
But I will say this; *NSYNC will always be in my heart and I pray that it is in his heart too, and I don’t mean just because he feels he has to make the acknowledgement, but because he truly values all they’ve done to get him to this point of success. And because he valued them as friends and the years of memories they made for themselves and for fans all over the world.
I feel like I’ve been waiting for answers, any answers, to just make me feel better about this whole 110 second *NSYNC performance and I know now that I’m never gonna get those answers. Because time and time again he floats around social media, doing countless media tours and he’d rather talk about Miley Cyrus’ twerking (like the rest of
the world) then actually owe up to the fact that he did his boys wrong. But whatever that’s his shit to swallow. I am just here as a fan. I love his work and to ignore that he’s a brilliant artist was never my intention with my previous “Post Vma” entries. I know he’s gifted, hell I’ve been a fan of his for more than half of my life, (the other half consisted of ya know being a baby and junk… a.k.a during his Mickey Mouse years, where I was too young to even really know about it, lol). Gosh fangirling is exhausting, all the little things you feel you have to know, to call yourself a fan, I mean why can’t you just enjoy the music, right… like the rest of the world? Well, honestly it’s not my style.
When I love something, I really love something, and it really shows, I’m all in, and I wanna shout it to the world…. *god help my future boyfriends* haha. I don’t think there is any other artist who I have loved so consistently for this long, granted Britney Spears is always a favorite. But I have to say given the choice I’d choose him. I guess it all goes back to their breakup, as a fan you had to choose sides, and with Justin Timberlake running around singing “Cry me a river,” my choice was made. Fangirls do not take lightly to other (especially famous) girls hurting their man! When they’re together, oh by all means we are happy for you, we think you are adorable and so in love, but the minute you do us, I mean him wrong, you are out, and it’ll never be the same.
I went through a little Britney break back then, tried to hate her, but gradually the hate faded and her music won me over, however, I still think what if? What if she hadn’t cheated… would they still be together…would she have had that meltdown… would they be married now… and would her kids be his??? I think so. I really do.
You know Justin tries to brush it off as puppy love, but if you ever see interviews or any footage of them together… holy god it was there, and you can’t fake that. They were really in love; they were obsessed with each other. I feel like that’s a common thing Justin likes to do, belittle his past only to try and forget it, because he doesn’t like to look back. But if you ask me I still think that no matter what you never forget a love like that. And I still think in some ways he still holds onto her, in any sense I mean “Cry me a river” won’t ever let him forget. But granted I’m a Britney fan, none the less. They both seem happy in their lives and seem to be civil toward each other, but I must say my relationship with Britney Spears isn’t how it used to be. I just feel like even though she’ll always be iconic and always be talented, I just feel like her mindset has been altered because of the amount of fame her life has endured. And unfortunately, not everyone is able to block the world out, and that fame consumed her. It isn’t an untold story, and she isn’t the first to let fame rear its ugly head at the expense of her career, sanity and overall life. But she’s coping, and she has seemed to turn things around for herself, so GO BRITNEY! But do I think her life would have turned out much different if Justin were still in it… hell to the yes.
In any sense, my relationship with Justin will always win out, because at the end of the day I am a super fan, and will always be. But will always have love for the queen of pop, let’s be real she’s still got it!
Justin you always think Britney, or at least I do! I guess now that I’ve had time to cool down and rationalize the fact that he’s actually human and not an angel sportin’ wings and a bright shiny halo, I have come to the consensus that once a fan girl always a fan girl. It’s all in how you carry the title. Sure… like his music, support his career, enjoy the obsession, but when shit hits the fan, and he acts like an ass…. It’s ok to be pissed, after all you’re a fan and fans are the opinions that actually count.
So Justin, I forgive your stupidity, but just don’t let it happen again. I love you; let’s give this thing another chance, shall we? 😉
Revised & Reformed
Justin Timberlake Fan
(or Future Mrs. Timberlake… whichever is preferred) 😉
[I do not take any credit for any of the celebrity photos or gifs]